There’s a mind-clearing technique for meditation where you imagine setting any thoughts that pop into your head on a leaf and let it float away from you. While I am not nearly as adept at meditation as I would like to be, I often use that leaf-in-the-water technique as a way of releasing negativity, worries fears, etc. As TCM approaches this weekend, I’ll be honest, I’m piling all sorts of emotional, injury-induced baggage on an entire flotilla of imaginary leaves in my mind.
My stream of consciousness goes something like this:
Damn this injury. Maybe it’s a sign I need to stop this whole running thing already.
Who needs running anyway? I’ll work my aggression out at a kick-boxing class.
I’ll go pump some iron and get ripped!
I’ll finally conquer my diet demons now that I don’t need the carbs for running.
At last! On the road to recovery with some PT.
But look at all the geezers in here with their hip/knee replacements, am I one of them?
AARP here I come.
What if my best runs are behind me?
Just when I think I’m coping pretty well with the fact that I’m not hydrating, packed and on my way to the race I’m not running, I’ll get an email from TCM for runner tracking signup or something else equally annoying to rub salt in the wounds.
In the grand scheme of things, it’s just as race. As time goes by it’ll become a blip in time. Like a rock on the beach, the sands of time will wash over it and smooth its painful edges. Without a doubt there are far bigger things to worry about, far worse issues in life to deal with. But that doesn’t make it hurt any less now.
To those of you that are toeing the line at an A-race this fall, I am with you in spirit, cheering you on from afar. May the planets align, Mother nature smile upon you, your training pay off and may you run the race of your dreams.
To those of you, who, like me are sidelined with injury, illness etc., my heart is with you as I know how hard it is. Keep the faith though. We will all be back. Stronger. In body and spirit.
