I hope everyone is enjoying the holidays as we get ready to say goodbye to 2016. Time waits for no one and neither do Runfessions so let’s seize this final chance to cleanse our sweaty souls (and soles) for the year.
I runfess I learned the hard way (twice) that wearing something from a race you didn’t actually run is indeed asking for trouble.
First there were the arm sleeves from the Twin Cities Marathon 2011. The one I took a DNS on due to an ornery hip. Bobbi was nice enough to drag home my race packet and there they were so fuzzy and inviting. So I wore them to run Indy. And what did I get? The most vile, wicked chafe of my running life. So heinous I’ve got scars to show for it.
Because I’m not a quick learner when it comes to recognizing bad karma, I made the same mistake again. I used the duffle bag from the 2011 Philadelphia Marathon…another DNS due to a certain ornery hip, it was one helluva a crapola running season…as my gear bag at this fall’s Schaumburg Turkey Trot. We all know how that turned out, don’t we? #hamstringhell
Note the chic, toothless look in the top pic and bottom left pics.
I’ve been a fuel-belt fan most of my running life. You’ll see it in most of my longer-distance race pics, from Boston to NYCM to Ragnar and everything in between. Well recently, no thanks to peri-menopausal belly fat, said fuel belt has been getting a tad snug….or maybe the Velcro’s just tired (who am I kidding?). One day I set off on a run and the Velcro simply said “no more” and released, sending my bottles crashing to the ground. No sooner did I stop to gather and regroup and it happened again. Imagine my disgust. Heavenly Father I am not proud but when it happened a third time, I runfess I took the damn belt, bottles and all, and whipped it in the bushes before continuing on. After all the years of service my fuel belt has given me, I’m sorry…kind of…it had to end this way.
I runfess this holiday season I bought a few things for myself when I should have been shopping for others. Two notable violations were these tanks. Lovely aren’t they? I thought so. The one on the left is the “old”one. Isn’t the new one on the right a a little too similar to really “need” it? Um yeah. If this wasn’t bad enough, I did the same thing with aqua tanks. Except I’m too lazy to take a pic. Tanks so nice I (sort of) bought them twice.
Along with my birthday this month was a trip to the doc for my annual physical. When you get in the 50+ club, the medical establishment pushes for a colonoscopy. I runfess I’ve been avoiding this like the plague. At my appointment my doc said she’d order it and they’d call to set it up. When the Gastroenterology dept called the other day I quickly told them Marcia was not in. That I was “Linda” her assistant. That Marcia was out of the country. For a month. Burn in hell. I’m going to.
Your turn! What have you to runfess? Spill it! I promise you’ll feel better!
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I had this whole list of things I needed to do. Colonoscopy was on the list. So was a gum graft. Guess what got pushed to the side after this little glitch in my health? I know I need to do these things. I need to see the derm too. I did get my mammogram, so there’s that…
God, I’m old.
Hahahaha this may be my very favorite of your Runfessions! I don’t blame you on running from the colonoscopy – I’m dreading the day I need a mammogram (the horror). I have also had several instances in my life where I’ve just snapped and thrown things (I would have chucked that fuel belt, too). However, I think you’re being a little hard on yourself with your tanks. Those are beautiful and if the “old” ones are the ones you reach for all the time, then you’ll reach for these new ones too. You’re allowed to get yourself some things during the holidays. Pinky swear 🙂 Thanks for hosting and giving me a good laugh!
Can I runfess that I almost wet myself reading this? Linda, the assistant? You crack me up 😉
OMG on the colonoscopy! Last week, after I just laid out my favorite ivory Athleta sweater to dry after some spot cleaning I started packing for my next business trip, pulled a similar-looking ivory Athleta sweater out of my closet, and realized I have two of the exact same sweater. I hope at least one was on sale when I got it!
I feel like I end up buying stuff that is similar to what I already have. Then i debate returning it but end up convincing myself that I do need it. I don’t blame you for avoiding the colonoscopy! Too funny that you said you were Linda the assistant!
Did you really pretend to be your own assistant?? LOL I will have to remember that one! I have a really nice shirt for a race I DNS’ed. It’s a thick short sleeve that is fitted- I don’t have many of those! It was from an obscure trail race so please don’t think I’m wearing the shirt in hopes that people think I ran it. I truly just find the shirt practical!
That’s so brilliant being your own assistant. I just would have ignored the call. Haha
I also shopped for myself more than I should have. But let’s face it — I wasn’t getting anything anyway! Plus the deals were too good to pass up. 😉
You know, if you don’t have a primary care doc, then they don’t push the colonscopy on ya. Although the truth is I definitely should do it.
Buy 2 of the same stuff, shop for myself? Guilty & guilty.
I’d wish you a happy holiday, but obviously it as been (as it’s snowing here . . . again) – so here’s to a happy 2017!
I could see you whipping that belt into the nature ! LOL.
And the whole thing about wearing gear from a race you didn’t run… well that is kind of spooky.
Thanks for the link up !
You mean we were not supposed to buy ourself something for Christmas?? YIKES! I am with you on all this testing. I can’t even get my car’s oil changed on time! UGH- the big C? I think we can poop on a stick – LOL! Let’s ask Wendy, that has to be good enough 🙂
I don’t blame you one bit for dodging the colonoscopy. And those tanks are totally different one is darker than the other and you need one in every color. 🙂 At least that would be my reasoning. Thanks for the laugh I can’t believe you pretended to be your own assitant. Have a great week!
Have to buy a few things for yourself too! I promise to try to jump on the runfessions in 2017
Can’t you just loosen the belt. I do. I still depend on my belts.
As far as the C – the prep is the much worse than the test.
I just bought a tank cuz it was cheap but it doesn’t match what I thought it did. Oh well. I guess I have to buy another.
Enjoy the warm weather. It is cold up here!
You are hilarious! Linda, your assistant? 🙂 Please don’t mess around with health stuff. If the doctor says you need it, then get it done. My friendly advice.
The fuel belt thing made me laugh. Perhaps it was just old and about to break anyway. I have two from Fitletic and love it.
I learned the nothing new on race day thing very well this year at my turkey trot. I bought the cutest new shirt that then chaved under my arms and it made wearing a shirt so uncomfortable! I had to put bandaids on for my 23 miler the next day and it hurt for a week!
Ack – can’t believe I forgot about runfessions!
Love your response when they called to set your appointment especially because I have been ducking and dodging my colonoscopy appointment like it’s my job! LOL! Ah the joys of reaching 50. OK we both need to do this – shall we commit to booking appts by the next runfession?
I know colonoscopies pick up stuff and prevent stuff, but in this day and age, isn’t there an easier way to do it? Sometimes I feel the medical procedures are created to embarrass us, and give us great horror stories.
usually the assistant thing is done when people are pretending they are a big deal business, like in that commercial.
Come on over, I will get you through the colonoscopy. I’ve had 8 or 9. I know all the secrets. Search my blog for them.
Have Linda call me! Lol! Lady, you know you need to get that done. Once you do you will be so glad you did.
I am so sorry about the chafing…that sounds horrible 🙁
Awww.. bye bye fuel belt.
I may or may not have gifted myself a time or 2 this holiday season. 😉
Happy new year friend! Now, right after you read this tell Linda to schedule the colonoscopy. I’ll be back to check!
I runfess I can’t use a fuel belt because my hip to waist ratio does not work, so I use a Camelbak – and while I love it I swear to heavens there is no way to clean it well. I may or may not be drinking bacteria mixed Nuun every time. The first few sips tasted a little off this morning – but I runfess I wanted the water enough I didn’t stop.
Wow! I love this! I love running and I feel like a lot of runners can agree with me that we have a high pain tolerance. Whenever we feel something off or painful, we ignore and simply keep on running in order to get to a certain mileage or pace. So my runfession this year is that I’ve ignored my body too much and had not listened to it when it was tired or in pain. Thus, as “revenge” or “karma,” I got a stress fracture on my foot during cross country season and was not able to run for a good 2-3 months. Thanks for sharing these runfessions! Can’t wait to see more! xo, Stephanie
ouch on the chafing and the hamstring…who knew karma worked in way like that!